![]() Mark and I were in full calling-it-off talks when we went home to his parents' city for a celebratory dinnerwith their friends and my parents. David promised me that he'd help me break the news to our parents. Irrational fears still in place, I suggested that Mark was the only one with the doubts. That night, I broke down and told my older brother thatit didn't look like we were going to get married. Then I thought: I'm not going to be able to pull that handkerchief. When he got to the part in the Jewish ceremony where the groom pulls the handkerchief out of the rabbi's hand, symbolizingthat he is entering into marriage of his own free will and signaling that the ceremony can proceed, the rabbi asked if I wanted to have the same opportunity, as ours was to be an egalitarian ceremony. One afternoon, over the phone, the rabbi walked us through the wedding ceremony. I had the irrational fear that my parents would somehow blame me for not being good enough for Mark or serious enough about marriage, or think I had somehow "ruined" a perfectly good thing. I dreaded telling my family that Mark and I were having serious problems. Lucky for you, the Almost Brides have been there, and we've got some wisdom for you. If you are close to the wedding day (say, two weeks out, as I was), you'll havethe added joy of contacting vendors. If you are early in the planning process, you'll "only" have to deal with telling people. Sandyīefore beginning the emotional work of getting over your loss, you're going to need to unravel the complex quilt that was your wedding. We stopped to get some crisps, and theshopkeeper said in passing, "Have a great day-life is about having fun," and I said to my sister, "You know what? I'm not having fun." And then I told her everything that I had kept from my family. One night, I met my sister in the city, as we were traveling to our parents' house together. How did they live to tell about it? Read their stories in an excerpt from the book: In many cases, the women featured in There Goes the Bride, were forced to call off what many women, and men, consider to be the most important day of their life - their wedding day. In Rachel Safier and Wendy Roberts' There Goes the Bride: Making Up Your Mind, Calling it Off and Moving On, real "almost-brides" reveal how they managed to call off their weddings. Ap- Runaway Bride may have been based more in reality than one would might have assumed.
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